Thursday, June 18, 2009

limited time offer!

This is your lucky day!

For a limited time only I am offering rides around town in an SUV that smells like throw-up. It will be an experience that you are not soon to forget. To register for this experience contact me. 

Q: How does one acquire a throw-up smelling SUV?
A: Simply put a sick child locked in their carseat, and drive to the "big city" to run errands with your husband. On your way home at the top of Parley's Canyon they will throw up. It will get all over their lap, carseat, and if you're lucky the floor too. 

Q: Can any child produce this outcome?
A: No, only the really sick ones who catch a nasty bug. 

Q: Where can my child catch this nasty bug?
A: Any public place, where there are other sick children running around and spreading it. Grocery store carts are believed to be a "hot spot" for picking up these types of bugs. 

Q: How long will this offer last?
A: Not long. There is an end in sight, and the smell will soon be gone and dealt with appropriately. This truly is a limited time offer. 
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As of June 19th...offer has officially expired. 

11 happy thoughts:

Daybreaking Dickersons said...

Oh now it's showing up. I think the option to make fun of you running while playing air guitar better.

Laura said...

I would take you up on your offer but lucky for us we had the opportunity to have a throw up SUV a few weeks ago. It was so much fun especially since it was on the way to church. Our experience required a new carseat.

Anonymous said...

So we experienced this limited time offer last year when we thought it would be a fun idea to drive the Alpine Loop! Gavyn-chocolate milk-and watermelon (lots of it) was NOT a good combination.

Allen Family said...

If I took you up on your tempting offer, I would only make it so you could prolong the offer. In fact, just the thought of it isn't treating me so well. Maybe I shouldn't have read this in the morning.

Amylee said...

I think I will be avoiding the Nelson household for a bit... unless you want the "limited time offer" to be available for a longer time period due to a sick adult.

Andrea said...

Oh so tempting. We have been lucky enough to not have this wonderful experience yet....I'm sure our day will come. Thank goodness for leather seats.

Noonan Family said...

We found that Lucy now gets car sick, everytime we go to Heber to see Gma Nooney we get to drive home with this smell. It is now at the point that we carry a blanket in the car for her to throw up in and Nooniy has the washer ready when we get there.
Oh the pure joy of being a mother!

Cathy said...

I want a ride!!

Advice from Ordinary People Flourishing Together said...

My little boy threw up in his car seat the other day because he was throwing such a huge fit that he gagged himself. That is wonderful, I got the great smell without having to have a sick child. Yea me! You are hilarious and you make me smile!

BRIAR said...

Give your kids chicken wings, licorice and soda. Lots of it. Spin them around, put them back in the car, drive some switchbacks and then call me.
The offer will be back in effect and I will sign up. See you then.

swensen squeeze said...

Sweet! Can i have a ride?? So sorry for the mess...not a fun clean up!!